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Change. I've learned to embrace it, ride it out til the end. Sometimes I'm kicking and screaming, other times weeping with my eyes clinched tight. Once in awhile I ride like a dog in a car, head out the window snorting what life has to offer. Mother to young adult children, a marriage of thirty years, and a desert to mountain to valley waltz with God have shaped me into someone I never imagined I'd be. Life is short and I want to live it. Tears, sighs, laughter and change. Every morsel granted to me. Scrambled, shaken or stirred.

Friday, October 15, 2010

Scribbles and Scrambles ~ Throne for a Loop

Throne for a Loop as written for my church newsletter....


We live/react out of what we know to be true and that "truth" is an interesting blend of part-truths and experiences.

This isn't necessarily a bad thing. It can be a wonderful thing when we have gotten to the point where the Holy Spirit speaks louder than the world, than our experiences, and louder than our friends.

But most of us live in the Mixlands...where truth is not necessarily truth when we are done interpreting it.

I've been thinking about this quite a bit lately. I struggle with misperceptions and miscommunications and misinterpretations of the truth. As I've considered this, it's occurred to me that the biggest thing in my life, the squeaky wheel of my struggles is going to be the thing that rises up in me and causes my reactions. And if that thing isn't God. My reaction is not going to be a good choice. It will come out of my weaknesses or fears or out of my pain.

There is an evangelical tract that spells it out (paraphrased) this way. Whoever sits on the throne of your life will be your governor/king/lord. I'd like to suggest that it's beyond that...that it's whatever sits on the throne of my life will be the thing I listen to, the thing through which I interpret life's happenings. That thing becomes lord and sometimes false savior in my life.

For example. I am a recovering people pleaser. I want to make people happy, to have them like me, want to be around me, etc. etc. etc. But in the past, that desire became a squeaky, screeching need. When someone didn't like me (Really, there are those who don't. Can you believe that?) My heart would start pounding when I was around them, and I'd get sweaty and I'd try...try...try to make them like me. And that behavior never really worked. Not only did they still not like me, they began to not respect me or began to take out restraining orders. The need to be liked had taken the throne. It had deposed and overthrown the rightful King. And people pleasing is a cruel king. Cruel. It demands, it shows no mercy and it takes everything of value from its subjects. Jesus clearly states that there will be people who don't like me because of Him. But He also clearly demonstrated that He loved me enough to slather my disgusting sins all over Him and wear them while dying in my place. Emotional needs are sneaky and would love to slide onto the throne of your life. Do you have any that have slithered close? Any making plans for an uprising?

Another area of evil kingship is addictions. Oh, we Christians still struggle with those. I'm not going to mention the ones that have 12-step programs. How about the addiction to control? Addiction to negativity or self-pity? Addiction to being right no matter the cost? Talk about killing, stealing and destroying. These are from the pits. Do you turn to something you NEED to help you through the day? Do you find yourself looking forward to a phone call from a friend so you can gossip?

And if those are enough usurpers of the throne. How about other people? Do you still hear someone's voice in your head and obey it instead of your Shepherd's voice? Your math teacher who said you'd never get beyond high school? Your music teacher who said you couldn't carry a tune in a bucket? A parent who was so broken that you couldn't please them even if they had succeeded into shaping you into the perfect child?

God belongs on the throne. He is the only one equipped to be a ruler. He has the resources and He has the lovingkindness to rule in your best interest. He has the power to guide you and direct you. He can protect you and He accepts you as the broken and deceived peasant that you are. He has provided living water for you to wash up in, and clothing to slip into, armor to protect you, and a voice that you can learn to listen to.

Take a peek into the throne room of your life. Who or what sits on the throne?

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