Thursday, August 25, 2011

Scribbles and Scrambles ~ Techie I'm Not




Remember Napoleon Dynamite?

Ha.Ha. I do. Mostly because every once in awhile a hilarious one-liner pops into my head. When my lips are dry I think about Napoleon. When I've been on the internet too much I feel like poor Kip who was chatting with babes on-line all day. When someone falls or gets hit with something I am reminded of Uncle Rico's steak thr
owing skills.

Yes. I'm a freak.

I'm a technologically-challenged freak.

Here's my dilemma. A techie one. In case I disappear from cyberspace for a few days you should know that I have not overcome my techie ignorance.

Dilemma:

Our house phone aka landline has become bait for telemarketers, survey phone calls and political pundits.
We all have cellphones and no one even answers the landline anymore. We rely on messages should a real person get through. Most are hang-ups or computer voices offering us better interest rates or suggesting we press some number or other to continue their message. In a word, annoying.

But. Our internet is connected to our landline. So. We've kept it. I finally decided enough was enou
gh and called our local cable company. We can have internet through them without a landline or cable. And it will save us money every month. So I ordered it.

The cable guy came Friday and kind of hooked us up. Except for the wireless router. We should be smart enough to figure it out. We tried tonight.

Sigh. It works, kinda maybe. The instructions are written in Greek with Greeklish translation. Okay. Not. It's fully English but of a dialect I can't understand. It's probably a stupid, tiny little issue. But it's huge in that it's not working!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So. I dedicate Kip Dynamite's "Always and Forever" also known as LaFawnduh's Song which I like to call "I Hate Technology" to non-techies everywhere, and I hope I don't disappear too long. At least I haven't canceled the old stuff yet. We are, for now, double-wired! ! !

Lyrics by: Kip Dynamite.

"Why do you love me
Why do you need me
Always and forever

We met in a chat room
Now our love can fully bloom
Sure, the World Wide Web is great
But you, you make me 'salvivate'

Yes, I love technology
But not as much as you, you see
But I still love technology
Always and forever

Our love is like a flock of doves"