My loyal companions and I had breakfast bright and early. Well, I ate while they stared at me willing me to drop said food. I think they are adorable when naked. And the chair sitting thing explains the tweed wardrobe I own. Of course, I also give them the last bite. Who's trained who? Or whom's trained whom. Ha Ha. I like that. Little freakin whoomers! Also I have convinced myself that they LOVE the heck out of me but the truth is they love my sharing spirit and the fact that I think they are adorable when naked, or in their harnesses or being naughty.
So the last two days I've spent learning I know nothing about my job. Things I learned twenty years ago are supposed to be somewhere in my brain. I was tested over this, I am supposed to know some of it, right? Fortunately, they are expecting nothing out of me. I believe I will have to ask to be given a task to do. I asked if I could get an order off the order hook yesterday and was given permission. So there's that. They have students from the radiology school nearly every day and they are tweaking them and their performance constantly. So in that I'll fit right in. Maybe. I'm scared to death to touch the equipment. Also there is a big red button that shuts everything down. It is in a perfect location for a Kelhap. Which is a mishap where I am intimately involved. I am very afraid.
I also forget how much I hate being out of my little village. I introduced myself to a couple of people and got somewhat pleasant greetings. One just said. "Hi...." monotone. Nothing. Nothing. Nothing. Then there are people dropping in constantly. Do I introduce myself to everyone? That's awkward, but so is standing or sitting on the outskirts of a conversation. Sheesh. Then, am I going to even be there very often? Should I just slip in and do my business and leave. Or is this actually going to be my new job and I'm going to be there every. single. day? I feel like when I am done with the huge amounts of medical records I'm dealing with the handwriting on the wall implies that I might very well have a new space to work from. The weird thing about the massive amounts of change makes me feel okay about that. What!?!?! So weird. Grateful for my job. And my crazy beagles. And goodness gracious every speck of the rest of my crazy life and the people who inhabit it!
Change. I've learned to embrace it, ride it out til the end. Sometimes I'm kicking and screaming, other times weeping with my eyes clinched tight. Once in awhile I ride like a dog in a car, head out the window snorting what life has to offer. Mother to young adult children, a marriage of thirty years, and a desert to mountain to valley waltz with God have shaped me into someone I never imagined I'd be. Life is short and I want to live it. Tears, sighs, laughter and change. Every morsel granted to me. Scrambled, shaken or stirred.