Scribbles and Scrambles ~ Scenes from the Farm...and Maybe a Few Other Places...

Scribbles and Scrambles ~ Daily Chops and Crabs...

So I had some produce that needed a little tender loving care. 

The grapes above, after cooking down and being squeezed through a cheesecloth and then cooked down more provided one jar of grape jam.  Even though I had gotten optimistic and prepped two. It tastes good, a little tart because I was very chintzy with the sugar, but good. 

Which brings me to the next project. A huge vat of dill pickle relish that filled seven pint-sized jars. 

Oh my. And there was a series of pickles when attempting to make the relish.  Two grocery stores were out of dill seed and mustard seed. Apparently EVERYONE in my city made dill pickles yesterday. And I almost forgot the garlic. And I had to buy lids. And improvise. And I WAS NOT about to go to a third grocery store. 

The recipe called for seeds, I used powdered mustard and dill weed. The recipe called for white vinegar, I used apple cider. The recipe called for a whole lot of sugar. WAY too much. So I used 1/4 the amount called for. 

I'm hoping I don't regret seven jars. 

Scribbles and Scrambles ~ Tiger Eye Focus Part 3

Tiger Eye Focus. How does that look with the violin?

Clearly, I'm not going to be running stairs and punching sides of beef.

For violin it will involve wanting.

Do I want to be able to play? If so, am I willing to play well and by the book?  After investing what I have so far, and with the goal of actually being able to play it, I'd be an idiot to say no. So by the book it is.

I think one of my issues might be that I tend to be more creative than mathematical in thinking.  I'm used to looking at an imperfect situation like a recipe fail or decorating issue and coming up with a way to fix or make it work. Relationships are fluid as well. Black and white math is not a strong area for me.

Music is spot on math. There is a formula and exacting timing and detail.  So. I need to stretch and work on this. It reminds me of when I had to take my algebra section of training for radiography and I had to borrow my then 8th grader's book to try to wrap my mind around it. So. I've done it before and I'll be doing it again. Math for the challenged.

Also. There is a huge element of risk in this journey. I'm not going to get the soup and cookies knocked out of me like poor Rocky. But, I have to put myself out there. My insecurities, my heart, a little bit of my soul, every week when I go to my lesson and every day when I practice. I have to reword the inner monologue and avoid beating myself up. When I'm ready to play in front of people, it's going to be even riskier. 

And. There is the cost of time and focus and attention. This violin thing costs money for lessons and broken strings and new books and gas to get there. But the time element is pretty huge and it comes out of the time that is precious to me. I have to give time to the have to things, non-negotiable, but what is not carved out of my life by others is me time. As one who leans towards being introverted, there is an extra amount of anxiety with this violin thing. When I'm practicing and going to lessons those are hours and minutes I don't get back. Am I willing to keep investing those hours and minutes and absorbing the cost? And if I do, why wouldn't I make the most of my valuable time and do it right? 

This is something that just came to me. I always thought of myself as a little flaky, a little bit of a quitter. I'm not saying that I haven't quit a few things in my day. But, overall I have this impression of myself that I flit from thing to thing and give up far too easily. I'm wondering why I have that impression. I am looking back at my track record and I see where I have whole-heartedly devoted myself to people and relationships and jobs and extras. And I see where some have gone through seasons, others have not been a good fit, others were not worth pursuing. But. The things I've dug into and given myself to are alive and flourishing. And I'm not a quitter. Far from it. 

Quitting is not an option. So therefore, I will give violin the time, energy and focus I need to in order to conquer the current set of problems I have with it. I can do this. 

Scribbles and Scrambles ~ Eye of the Tiger Part 2

My violin "lesson" of the week focused on developing a tiger's eye. I'm at the point when I need to make a level of commitment higher than what I've already made. It's not about paying the money for the lessons. It's not about practicing and learning. After my Thursday playing-through-the-song performance my teacher gave me three ways to look at what was missing from my musical repertoire. 

Lesson One) teeny, tiny details make a huge difference. If I am putting my fingers down just to put my fingers down, then I'm not making music. If I can't put my fingers exactly where I need to put them the exact time they need to go there with the exact called for bow stroke, then I'm making noise, not music. 

My teacher was kind. And explained that he has to look for both growth, which he sees, and the errors that need to be nipped in the bud and removed so they don't flower into something stinky. And speaking of stinky...

Two) is the second illustration, the dirty diaper. He said babies don't understand the implication of a dirty diaper. And adults really don't change dirty diapers because it's fun, they do it for the best interest of the baby.  Which takes us to the third illustration which is totally related but unrelated. 

Three) Developing the eye of the tiger... Rocky-style. Rocky spent hours and hours running up and down steps to get in shape. He spent hours conditioning himself by beating on slabs of beef in a meat locker. He prepared mentally and let's not forget the musical score.  

I need to develop the same drive and focus with my violin, committing to learning how to play this instrument like I wish I could play it, and how I should play it. So it's music, not mish-mash sloppy. So. To the Tiger-Eyed focus I go. But what does that look like? Definitely not running up stairs with my violin held up high over my head. I hope. 

Scribbles and Scrambles ~ Tiger Eye Focus

My goal for Thursday's violin lesson was to just get through one of my songs. 

I hadn't pulled that off yet, well, a real song, Two lines and eight measures doesn't count. During my lesson my teacher consistently says things like "just keep going." "Don't stop." as I'm squealing through my song bits.

So, I did just keep going and didn't stop even when I made a few mistakes. (read: a lot of mistakes). I was pretty proud of the fact that I hadn't stopped. I knew my fingering was off several times and my tempo was not as written. The parts that were easier I played at the 1/8 note tempo. The parts that were trickier were maybe more like staccato 1/4 or 1/2 notes. (That means SLOW with unwritten and unexpected pauses.)

Then. After I was done he told me that I had improved since the week before. 


But. 

There are always buts in violin. I think that's because there are a million things to mess up on. It might be bowing wherein a fraction too far one direction means I play two squeaky strings, a fraction too far the other direction and I play two other squeaky strings. If I really mess up, I play three squeaky strings. Holding the neck of the violin and bow are uber important. Reading the notes and playing them in the proper rhythm is tricky, for me anyway, and uber important. Practicing properly is important. Knowing the different techniques that give different sounds is important. And then there is something else that is even more important. And. I think you need to come back tomorrow for the rest of that story. 

Scribbles and Scrambles ~ Twist and Stretch Part 4

I don't know if it's kosher to make up your own definition. But I'm going to replace the word nice in my vocabulary and I'm borrowing parts of the definitions I want to describe me. 

pleasing; agreeable; delightful

characterized by, showing, or accuracy,precision, skill, tact or care

not severe 

may be relied on; 

dependable in achievement, accuracy, honesty

a good or benevolent nature or disposition, as a person: having, showing, or proceeding from benevolence: considerate, or helpful; humane 

esteem for or a sense of the worth or excellence of a person 

relaxed free from stress; easygoing; carefree

Treating people with respect because there is a worthiness in all people because they are created by God, in His image, even if they don't treat me well.

What's not included. 

No doormat in the definition. 

No acting nice just because. 

Scribbles and Scrambles ~ Twist and Stretch Part 3

Definitions...

nice

adjective, nic·er, nic·est.

1.

pleasing; agreeable; delightful: a nice visit.

2.

amiably pleasant; kind: They are always nice to strangers.

3.

characterized by, showing, or requiring great accuracy,precision, skill, tact, care, or delicacy: nice workmanship; a niceshot; a nice handling of a crisis.

4.

showing or indicating very small differences; minutely accurate,as instruments: a job that requires nice measurements.

5.

minute, fine, or subtle: a nice distinction.

pleas·ant

 

adjective

1.

pleasing, agreeable, or enjoyable; giving pleasure: pleasant news.

2.

(of persons, manners, disposition, etc.) socially acceptable or adept; polite; amiable; agreeable.

3.

fair, as weather: a pleasant summer day.

4.

Archaic. gay, sprightly, or merry.

5.

Obsolete . jocular or facetious.

gen·tle

 

adjective, gen·tler, gen·tlest,verb, gen·tled, gen·tling.

adjective

1.

kindly; amiable: a gentle manner.

2.

not severe, rough, or violent; mild: a gentle wind; a gentle tap onthe shoulder.

3.

moderate: gentle heat.

4.

gradual: a gentle slope.

5.

of good birth or family; wellborn.

kind

adjective, kind·er, kind·est.

1.

of a good or benevolent nature or disposition, as a person: akind and loving person.

2.

having, showing, or proceeding from benevolence: kind words.

3.

indulgent, considerate, or helpful; humane (often followed by to ): to be kind to animals.

4.

mild; gentle; clement: kind weather.

5.

British Dialect . loving; affectionate.

re·spect

 

noun

1.

a particular, detail, or point (usually preceded by in  ): to differin some respect.

2.

relation or reference: inquiries with respect to a route.

3.

esteem for or a sense of the worth or excellence of a person, apersonal quality or ability, or something considered as amanifestation of a personal quality or ability: I have great respectfor her judgment.

4.

deference to a right, privilege, privileged position, or someoneor something considered to have certain rights or privileges;proper acceptance or courtesy; acknowledgment: respect for asuspect's right to counsel; to show respect for the flag; respect for theelderly.

5.

the condition of being esteemed or honored: to be held in respect.

self·ish

adjective

1.

devoted to or caring only for oneself; concerned primarily withone's own interests, benefits, welfare, etc., regardless ofothers.

2.

characterized by or manifesting concern or care only foroneself: selfish motives.

re·li·a·ble

 

adjective

that may be relied on; dependable in achievement, accuracy,honesty, etc.: reliable information.

a·gree·a·ble

 

adjective

1.

to one's liking; pleasing: agreeable manners; an agreeable sensation.

2.

willing or ready to agree or consent: Are you agreeable to my plansfor Saturday?

3.

suitable; conformable (usually followed by to  ): practiceagreeable to theory.

laid-back

adjective Slang.

1.

relaxed or unhurried: laid-back music rhythms.

2.

free from stress; easygoing; carefree: a laid-back way of living.