Scribbles and Scrambles ~ Monday Morning Raccoon Pooped on My Shirt Blues

How often in life does one get to write out a title like that? Or get pooped on by a raccoon? Rarely. So how can I not blog about it?

My crazy friend, (Most of them are, so she won't be offended should she happen to wander by and see that I have referred to her as crazy. She'll never know I'm even talking about her. Ha. Ha. And actually, craziness is pretty much a requirement to be my friend.) is a animal rescuer who definitely puts her money where her mouth is, or her curtains in the line of fire, or her sleep patterns on hold.... she just got three baby raccoons to "nurse" until they are old enough to brave the great outdoors all by themselves. The lady who contacted her currently is bottle feeding 30...been a rough year for raccoon mamas. 

& and I had to go see this triple raccoon threat on Saturday. Oh my. They are cute. 

The trio didn't care for & and I exactly. Oh, there were no "Does somebody need a hug? moments but some chatters of complaint when we held them. One climbed up over &'s back and down an arm and onto a vanity. And the one I held finally cuddled in a bit then moved along my chest. Turns out she was pooping on me. Yeah. Only one who got pooped on during this little visit. All across the chest, down an arm and on my hand. 

At least it was baby poop, I told myself, I've had lots of experience with baby poop. 

Going to have to go back and visit them a few more times before they are ready to be released.

Scribbles and Scrambles ~ Crittercized

Critters.

nothing to do with critters. a salad named fresh garden salad. ha. ha.

1st handful of raspberries. AMAZING

A few critter experiences of late.  Coincidence? I think not!

Chipmunks have been a problem in Wisconsin. I found a tip for making their homes less welcoming and sent it to our Wisconsin friends. Hopefully, the changes in their environment will mean they'll move to a better location soon. 

Soon to be moving chipmunk?

(The chipmunks, not the people.) 

Spicy front door.

I found a few friendly little critters while at the garden shop in Wisconsin. Mine is now sporting a nice blue stripe that wasn't there when I bought him. Someone, who broke his little neck, wondered why anyone would keep snakes on the floor. I wondered why anyone would walk without looking. But it's all good.

Snakes on the floor = broken necks, who knew.

The farm this week....the lettuce. Well, let's just say critter season is in full bloom. And if you buy organic lettuce at a decent price, you should probably find the farmer who picked it and give him/her a pat on the back, a huge hug, or a jumbo java. Because, if their experiences are anything like mine, they need hugs, pats and java. Let's just say, after I picked the green or white gutted vermin off the lettuce leaves and stomped them over and over again, I got a wee bit queasy. Not tomato worm weirded-out, but, it changed me. 

Not THE squirrel...a country cousin.

Finally, Mrs. Toad Boy (my daughter-in-law) and Toad Boy strolled to a local restaurant and had an encounter with a squirrel. Now, this girl LOVES squirrels. I've seen her stand statue still for a VERRRY long time to get some good pictures of rodents. So, no doubt, when she spied the squirrel she was probably giddy. 

But, then, it started chasing/stalking them. She said they'd stop and look at it and it would veer to one side and become all incognito and pretend that it wasn't following them. But peripherally she'd see it keeping pace and even creepier, gaining on them. She said they sped up and actually rushed the entrance. Heart pounding, feeling like they had escaped an awful fate, and the squirrel, seeing that they got away, went and hid behind a car and peeked at the door.  Was it waiting for them to come out? 

She said the walk home was a little tense, especially down the block where the incident occurred. They did arrive home unscathed but a little shaky. Methinks her squirrel picture taking days will include a catcher's mask and some leggings now. 

Watch your backs, people. That's all I'm going to say. 

Scribbles and Scrambles ~ Oy Vey, Watch That Mouth ~

I learned something yesterday. 

Let me back up a bit and give you some history. I have three bosses. (Technically four, however, one might choose only to ground me vs. get rid of me, and we'd have five if one of my coworkers got her way.) But that little aside is beside the point. 

So my three bosses have all fired me at least once. One of them got up to seven or eight times (I lost count) but then he decided that since I just kept coming back post firings he needed to up the ante. He began publicly booing me. When I forget to do "the only job that I really need to do/worry about is keeping paper in the printer" I get a hearty boo. (You'd think, since that's my only "have to" chore I'd never forget, but I kind of like getting fired and being booed...call me an adrenaline junkie.)

Yesterday said boss comes in complaining because he has a hole in his pants. (No, that was my first thought, too, but it was on the side of his pants.) He said he felt like a (insert now forgotten Yiddish word here). I said, "Bummer, Dr. (insert forgotten but parroted Yiddish word here.)"

His eyes got wide and he stared at me. "You can't call me that!"

I smiled. "You just called yourself that, why?"

"That's a bad Yiddish word. You can call me (rattled off 6 or 7 Yiddish words that sounded suspiciously like THE word but I've forgotten them, too.) but (TABOO YIDDISH WORD) is reserved for bad situations or used by very elderly Jewish ladies who's frontal cortex has lost it's inhibition filter."

Ha. Ha. Good thing my memory is like a colander or I might be tempted to slip it into everyday conversation. Next to a good public booing, or firing, my favorite just might be shocking my bosses into speechlessness or leaving them laughing. 

So, my advice, get out there and act like a (insert forgotten but TABOO Yiddish word here) and see where that gets you.

Scribbles and Scrambles ~ Weekend Adventure

Dairy barn. Beautiful girls patiently waiting for milking.

We spent a bit of time in Wisconsin over the weekend. First time for me, ever. I may have crossed over the border on my way elsewhere, but this was my first time hanging out in this lovely state. Here are a few highlights. 

This little guy really liked me...enough to eat me. Ha. Ha.

We created a prayer garden out of a blah section of the Bible camp. We walked past a cow who was in labor. (You don't probably want details. Let's just say the calf wasn't appearing yet but other stuff was.) & discovered that lazy Wisconsin rivers can contain some impressive rapids and have electric fencing strung across them.

Some moving water in the lazy river.

The lazy part of the river.

Beautiful buildings....

Nice discovery on returning home....blueberries almost ready.

Raspberries, too.

Popcorn loving chickens.

A wee bit of the Secret Prayer Garden.

Scribbles and Scrambles ~ Random Thought Bubbles

 After the first trip to the farm where we cut, washed, and sang the praises of the most amazing bounty we arrived to the parking lot where we'd met up to carpool. 

Ironically, it was a local grocery store. Even more ironically, check out the sign. 

Yeah. Right.

Scribbles and Scrambles ~ Law Lessons ~ Moving On

I’m sad I'm done with my Citizen’s Police Academy classes. Not only was it informative and fun, but it has so, so given me a deep respect for these men and women who keep our community safe. If you are a law enforcement officer and happen to stumble upon this post, thank you. I think that when we (the clueless citizens of the world) feel safe and can sleep well at night we kind of take for granted that someone is making that possible.

Since Memorial Day is coming, and since it’s fresh on my mind… here is my shout out to all military and service professionals and volunteers who clean up our lives, keep us safe, and provide a life that we Americans expect and demand. Thank you for the price you have been willing to pay. And forgive us for being ignorant and ridiculous and selfish. Because we are all of those things. I hope that I will be a lot less all of the above after sitting through this class.

Thank you for working while we sleep (literally) and while we are away from our homes and while we are on the roads. Thank you for being gutsy enough to take the crap that is dished out, and strong enough not to retaliate with the power you’ve been entrusted with. Thank you for silently watching wherever you go. Thank you for suffering in that silence when you observe and experience the seamy ugliness of the depraved and broken human soul. Thank you for being willing to do this day after day, not knowing what you will encounter.

Thank you for being the grown up, the adult, the voice of reason and actually caring about the outcome in so many “reality television show” type dramas. Thank you for stopping speeders and red light runners. Thank you for stopping drivers who weave around in traffic whether they are under the influence of texting or talking, alcohol or drugs, or even just stupidity. Thank you for attempting to teach and redirect those who don’t know how to parent or be in a relationship with someone else. Thank you for showing up and being men and women of honor and integrity. Thank you for taking a hit and standing back up again willing yourself to heal so you can reenter the game.

Thank you.

Scraps and Snippets ~ Peanut Chocolate Chippers

Peanut Chocolate Chipper Cookies

36 ish Cookies

3 TBSP ground flax
3/4 Cup of apple sauce OR 1/2 a banana and 1/4 Cup of non-dairy milk. (the browner the banana the sweeter and more bananay it will taste. The one I used was yellow with a few small brown spots and was still firm. A mild banana taste was there, a riper one might be too bananay unless you love bananas.)

3 TBSP peanut butter
1 tsp baking soda
1 tsp cream of tartar
1 tsp salt
3/4 Cup brown sugar

1 tsp almond extract
2/3 Cup garbanzo bean flour
1 and 1/3 Cup Whole Wheat Pastry Flour

1 cup chocolate chips 

1 cup peanuts

Mix the flax and banana/milk or applesauce together in a bowl and let sit a few minutes so it gels a bit.

Add the peanut butter and sugar. Cream or mix well. Add the soda, cream of tartar and salt, mix. Add garbanzo bean flour, stir. Add vanilla and stir. Mix in flour and stir until blended. Add chocolate chips and peanuts.

Chill dough for 20 minutes. Line cookie sheet with parchment paper or grease a pan. Roll dough into 1 inch or so balls. (If too sticky dip hands in sugar)  Flatten balls slightly. You can sprinkle them with sugar if you aren't going to frost them. Bake at 350 for approx 12 minutes. Let rest for a few minutes, then slide onto a cooling rack.