Scribbles and Scrambles - Talk Like a Pirate Day --- And All The Tea in China

Can I sleep tonight without giving a hearty nod to National Talk Like a Pirate Day? Argh! I think not!

If'n you like rollicking pirate adventures, and ya know me do...hare's one more link for the clickin.

All the Tea in China... sounds like a book for landlubbering wenches. But the pirate scene warmed me up like two-week old grog puddin and put a pillaging gleam in me eye.

If''n ya aren't a yellow-belly, go check it out. Argh!

Go on. Whaterya waitin for?

Serials and Scenarios - The Ex-Files

Victoria Christopher Murray's latest release, The Ex-Files is appearing on the Christian Fiction Blog Alliance this week.

Click on Victoria's name and/or on the book cover to visit sites with more info.

My Review

I haven't read a racier Christian novel this year. Spicy, embarrassingly so, in some spots. But also gritty in consequences and pain. Almost feels like the voyeuristic blush I get when reading Song of Solomon, or some of "those" passages in the prophets.

Four characters each face the end of a relationship -- a mistress, and three wives. All relationships are devastated by sinful choices and are full of the fallout of consequence. Each of the four women handles her situation in a unique way or blend of dysfunction. One grows icy cold, another gives up, a third comes out fighting. In the end we see some healing and growth that comes from internal surgery brought about through the characters pain.

The storytelling is fabulous. Some passive writing is the major mechanical flaw but the story certainly overcomes this minor issue.

The Ex-Files made me squirm and judge and then fall under conviction. I think those of us who've been in the church for a long time will be more horrified at these "Christian" ladies behaviors because they are so obviously blatant in their choices. But after we've been steeped in religion, our sins tend to be more subtle, becoming attitudes or whispers. The Ex-File reminded me that these "lesser sins" also need to be put under Christ's Lordship and forgiven as they are indeed ugly sins.

You may not be ready to read this book. Don't give it to Grandma for Christmas without checking out a few pages yourself. Certainly don't leave it lying around for a bored twelve-year-old.

Please don't overlook or discount the lessons in this book of parables. The outloud sins of the characters and the lavish grace of Jesus's forgiveness may call some who struggle deeply with sin strongholds into giving those patterns to Christ. Prodigals may benefit, older teens (very mature – this is PG-13+) may benefit from seeing the internal, emotional consequences of the drama lifestyle.

If you're looking for gritty and edgy Christian fiction – you might want to look into The Ex-Files.

Serials and Scenarios - The Betrayed - Lisa Bergren

Click on the book covers to visit the Amazon page, or Lisa's pic to visit her website.

The Betrayed (Book 2 in the Gifted Series)

I love this series.

Intrigue, passion, hope, heart, history.

If you love great stories, tight writing and church history teamed with romance, fantasy, suspense and mystery, you've got to get this series. If you loved DaVinci Code, Rivers' The Mark of the Lion, Bright and Cavanaugh's Great Awakenings you'll find much to like in The Gifted series.

As far as flaws, they are tiny. Three very similar names of major players confused me at the beginning, but once I figured it out, it didn't hinder my enjoyment. Bergren does a small amount of telling and some passive writing, but to tighten this series up any further would have made the story almost too tense.

Those who will not read speculative Biblical fiction may not like this series. It is based on a "lost" letter. Bergren does not twist doctrine or attempt to rewrite Scripture, she just adds a story line happening centuries after the Bible, as we know it, was fully formed. What if the gifts of the Spirit landed on individuals who then were drawn together in a group and called to fulfill a path chosen by God? Good question and the amazing story playing out in just such a scenario.

The Betrayed is a powerfully written, gut-wrenching tale. As the characters agonize and struggle with the Gift that each has been given, and the responsibility that comes with it, I couldn't help but think of Job's wife's counsel. "Curse God and die."

The characters are brought to that point, the one where all they have left is the struggle between believing God is who He says He is, and finding a shortcut out of their pain. Each character is three dimensionally formed and believable as they accept, in degrees and layers, God's calling and their expected obedience.

The spiritual warfare aspect of the book is powerful as well, classic good versus evil, but with the good showing weakness and insecurity and evil showing raw magnetism.


The Begotten (Book 1 in the Gifted Series)

A meaty read full of intrigue, brave men, the power of God as He works through His people, and fictionalized history.

Based on the reality of a "missing" letter written by the Apostle Paul, the author, Lisa Bergren, has woven a series based on the powerful gifting of Christ's disciples in different ways. Victorious gifts to bring wholeness and healing to God's trodden down church. What might happen when spiritual wholeness is revealed to people who've lost the possibility of intimacy with God through mere religion?

One flaw I discovered that made the following of the story slightly difficult was similar names of three moderate to major characters. Additionally, those who want authentic language with their historical fiction may be slightly disappointed. However, I discovered the modern feel of the storytelling with occasional historical term or word usage made the story easier to follow.

The Begotten is set in Italy in 1339, a dark time for the church. Martin Luther's rise to return God's Word to the people happened within the next two centuries. The 1339 church kept the faithful separated from God's Word.

If you start on The Begotten, you'd better have The Betrayed ready to dive into because you won't want to stop.

The Begotten has the feel of Francine River's Mark of the Lion trilogy. History buffs and those, like me, who need a little fiction to make history come alive should enjoy The Begotten. I would imagine fans of The DaVinci Code and the movie Luther would get much from this series as well.

And a few words from Lisa...

Fiction character you would most like to be or most identify with and why?

Vito, my comic relief character in this dense, dramatic Gifted trilogy. I always love the sidekick guy who makes me laugh in movies—Vito is that guy, here. He keeps the others from always being so darn serious, all the time. And he’s remarkably good with a sword. I think it would be cool if I was remarkably good with a sword. Who knows when that might come in handy?!


If you could change something in any novel, what would you change about it and why?

Sigh. I probably would have written an ending for the love affair in The Bridge. I wanted it to be more of a God/man love story than a man/woman love story, and thought I’d given enough hints to readers that the man/woman would obviously end up happy-ever-after, but half my readers were mad at me for not putting it on-stage. Life’s too short to deal with reader-wrath.


Favorite turn of phrase or word picture, in literature or movie.

“The story of your life is the story of a long and brutal assault on your heart by the one who knows what you could be and fears it.” –John Eldredge, Waking the Dead

This quote gives me a chill (and a thrill) every time I read it. It reminds me that (a) we have to be aware that we live within a world at war and we are God’s front line and (b) that Satan wants nothing more from us than to FORGET this central truth.


Anything you’d do but don’t because of fear of pain? What is it? Ex. Bungee jumping, sky diving, running with scissors.

Climbing Mt. Everest. In fact, climbing anything over 11,000 feet is probably over my limit, but those Mt. Everest people are insane. I don’t even admire them…what’s to admire? Oxygen tanks? Passing dead, frozen bodies no one wants to haul down and bury? Ick.


Grammatical pet peeve…sound off.

Me/myself/I mixups…Please, everyone, you can learn this one! There is a propensity for everyone to use “I” now just because they think “me” is generally wrong and they don’t want to sound foolish. So they say things like “Would you care to go to the movies with Lisa and I?” (That should be “Lisa and me.”) Just test the phrase in another format in your head to “hear” the correct version. Ex. Would you care to go to the movies with me? You wouldn’t say: “Would you care to go to the movies with I?” See how wrong that sounds?! That’s how you tell!


Unidentifiable antique, the scent of pipe tobacco and the drizzle of rain – make a scene.

She loved the sound of Portland’s rain, sliding down the plate-glass windows and gurgling down the gutters outside. As a little girl, time spent in her grandfather’s library had filled her mind and heart with a million memories of half-light, dulled by a thick layer of clouds outside, the chill of rain and the warmth of a fire in the library hearth. When she closed her eyes, she could see the clouds of smoke surrounding her grandfather as he bent over a book, puffing away at a pipe like he was a train engine chewing through the coal. She could almost smell the sweet odor of it…

But her grandfather was dead and gone, never to smoke a pipe again. And he’d left her this--some sort of antique box that appeared impossible to open--as the key to her legacy. Why did he always have to make things so difficult?

Serials and Scenarios - M L Tyndall - Pirate Dates and Other Pirate Dirt

Mary Lu Tyndall's The Restitution released September 4th. Mary Lu agreed to answer my deepest, darkest most secret pirate curiosities.

Enjoy...uh...maybe enjoy is a little inappropriate...how about "Argh, jest read it already!"

Thanks Mary Lu...this was fun.

I love to read good, gritty pirate talk. One of my favorite phrases from the book "Pirate Parenting" is "me cat kittened in me mouth"…What is your favorite pirate (real or made-up) phrase?

My favorite real pirate phrase is Dance the Hempen Jig –which means to hang for pirating. (I know, sorry. I have an odd sense of humor.)

The most atrocious and disgusting pirate behavior is (family friendly of course)
(mine would be the teeth of lack thereof – shudder)

Well, as you can imagine, pirates had quite a few disgusting behaviors, personal hygiene definitely among them. You might also say that their language and morals were quite lacking as well. But by far, the most atrocious behavior I have come across was they way they punished members of their own crew. A serious offense, such as trying to take more than their share of the plunder, would ofttimes sentence the offender to a ritual called keelhauling. Without being too graphic, the man was tied to a rope that looped beneath the vessel, then thrown overboard and dragged under the “keel” of the ship. I’ll stop there, short of telling you what that did to him. Yikes!

Describe a pirate's dream date.

First a lovely meal of Salmagundi—a favorite pirate dinner (a stew of chopped beef, fish, turtle, chicken, eggs, anchovies, onions, grapes, herring, cabbage, seasoned with salt and vinegar. Yummy!) by candlelight sittin’ over a barrel on the poop deck of the ship.
A swig of Rum (to be shared with lady fair, only if she has all her teeth an’ smiles at ye real pretty)
Bring out the boys with their fiddles, and dance a jig across the main deck to lewd pirate ballads.
A swig of Rum (to be shared with lady fair if she still hasn’t fainted from the stench of ye)
Show the lady yer treasure and allow her to count the pieces of eight from the chest. (This be sure to get her in the mood for love!)
A swig of Rum (Dependin’ on how much rum ye’s got left, ye may or may not want to be sharin’ anymore with the lady)
Chase the fair lady around the deck fer a kiss (If ye can’t catch her, shoot her)
A swig of Rum (no more sharin’)
Find a worthwhile target. (A Spanish ship, British ship, Dutch Ship, French ship…well, any ship, really) and fire yer cannons an’ blow it to smithereens
Finish off the Rum
Pass out on the deck and lady fair has to find her own way off the ship and back home.


Which "real life" pirate (or legend I suppose) would you have most like to have met? And why?

I would have to say, the pirate, Stede Bonnet, also known as the gentleman pirate. He was a well educated man who had a successful plantation on Barbados, and one day, he gave it all up, bought a ship and became a pirate. Later captured at Charles Town, SC, he was imprisoned in the provost marshal’s house, where he dressed up like a lady and escaped. Unfortunately, he was recaptured only 14 days later and despite his pleadings for mercy—in addition to many appeals from the ladies of Charles Town—he was hung for piracy. His reasons for becoming a pirate? Only God knows, but Bonnet did confess that he found great “discomforts in the married state”. I also tend to think he was just bored. He had achieved all there was to achieve for a man of his breeding and education and found the rest of his days spanning out before him in mindless tedium. But, I’ll wager he was a pretty interesting guy to talk to. (But, then again, I like to talk to unusual people)

Detail your favorite pirate activity, custom or superstition

My favorite Pirate superstition has to be the Flying Dutchman. Even though the Disney Pirate movies have only recently made it popular, the tale has been around since 17th century. The Flying Dutchman is a ghost ship that can never return to port and is doomed to sail the seas forever. Seen from afar, she appears to glow with a ghostly light. If you sail close enough, her crew will try to send messages to people long since dead. A sighting of this ship is a foreshadow of doom. The story goes that it was once captained by a Dutchman Bernard Fokke who made a pact with the devil as he encountered a storm trying to round the Cape of Good Hope. According to other versions, some horrible crime took place on board, and the crew was infected with the plague and not permitted to anchor at any port so as not to spread the disease. Since then, the ship and its crew are doomed to sail forever, never putting in to shore.

And here's my take on the book:

Of the two Legacy of the King's Pirates novels I've read, The Restitution is my favorite. I think it could work well as a stand alone, so even if you haven't read the first two in the series, you can find a great story in The Restitution.

M L Tyndall knows her pirates. Unfortunately, she shares a little too much in the smell department, but, alas, I'm sure being there was worse.

Captain Carlton shaped nicely from a creep (book 2) into a roguish and attractive man. Isabel softened into a woman I could grow to like.

The story moved at a fast clip - probably about 40-50 knots- and there were a few unexpected squalls. Last but not least, romance, hoped for and unexpected alike, flourished under star lit skies.

If you love pirate adventure, adventure in any format, romance, pirates or just fun stories you should find much to like in The Restitution.

Get yer grubby mitts on a copy.

And for the morbidly curious in the group. Keelhauling defined.

Scribble and Scrambles - Feral Will of The Sharpened Teeth

I was recently inspired to pen a poem.

I think it is up there with "Die, Cricket, Die" with less violence.

Well...maybe not.

This poem rhymes...kind of.

I've entitled it...Feral Will of the Sharpened Teeth

Augh!
I'm being bitten
By a kitten
Wearing taloned mittens.

Gasp!
I'm being gnawed
By a clawed
Beastie-wad.


Yes. It's short, lame and to the point.

And you were expecting...?

In case you don't know the story of Feral Will. Let me share.

Late one recent afternoon the puppies bee-lined toward something fascinating. Their body language prompted us to investigate the reason for much enthusiasm, and there, holding his own, with a Halloween cat pose, stood a teeny kitten.

Of course we saved him, whisking him into the newly formed Klepfer Kitten Foster Care Program. However, over the days of waiting for the few people we asked to adopt him to accept or decline our offer, he began to grow on us. And most importantly, Rob.

Rob didn't care for the name chosen by the household females. Feral Will originally answered to Q-Tip. Full black save for a white-tipped tail, we felt it appropriate.

But with the realization that we could keep him and armed with the goal of a man pleasing name change we struggled through several possibilities. Finally, we decided to use his less than wonderful arrival and add a twist. Acceptance of the truth and a tribute to the Piglet's great-grandfather (Trespassers Will) and an actor appearing in two of our favorite movies.

Now, that dear readers, is creativity through the sieve of twisted minds.

Would now be an appropriate time to tell you that the picture is a body-double? Feral Will was unavailable for a picture at this time.

Scribbles and Scrambles - Let Your Voice Be Heard and Maybe Win a Free Book!

Thought I'd pass this along. Bethany House is offering a chance to win one of several recent book titles for a few minutes of your time. Click above and share your opinions on a new book's cover.

If you are interested in the science and art of book covers, visit Novel Journey.

I'm not sure what tomorrow's blog post will bring. We'll see what shakes loose tonight.

Have a good one.

Serials and Scenarios - Life, Libby and the Pursuit of Happiness

Here's a fun Chick-Lit to curl up with now that days are getting shorter and the air is getting that fallish nip. (This is the best time to live in Iowa where our seasons are changeable, often mixed up, but different.)

Click to visit Hope.

My Review:


There have to be subgenres in Chick-Lit.

If so, Libby would straddle career and dismal love life lit.

Libby is an engaging voice. Angst riddled as are most Chick-Lit heroines. With first person Chick-Lit you get all of it, the good, the bad and the ugly.

Libby is far more likeable than several other characters I've met between the covers of novels. She's sarcastic and has a dry delivery. If you try to avoid snide, she hovers on that edge, so you may not like her. I happen to love sarcasm.

There is tad too much predictibility in Libby's life. But I guess that is somewhat realistic. After all, sometimes I'm the last one to see it because I'm so close to it.

I struggled with a few "yeah right" moments of coincidence. But then again, this is not the mystery genre.

Overall, I can easily recommend this book to those who love clever escapist reads.