My modified family took a walk last week.
Our oldest, a son, grew up and got married.
But we are still five, we've just added another female to take his place. Not the same.
She smells much better. But I digress.
Smell -- have you ever noticed that smells are huge memory triggers?
We walked through a park that is designated as a "wild prairie" and the "wild flowers" and/or weeds as some call them are about mid-thigh high. (If you are 5'2" like certain individuals who choose to remain nameless.) Not that we actually walked through them -- Iowa is known for chiggers -- if you don't know what those are, be grateful.
As we walked through the patch I was instantly transported back to my bean-walking days. Bean-walking -- oh my -- I don't know that it gets any better than that. A person wakes before dawn to get a good start. Water jugs, filled with tepid water at the end of endless rows of moist green leaves, dirt and bugs, the only reward for a job well done. Literally, bean-walking is a stroll through a bean-field ridding it of weeds. Good times. Oh, and a laborer got a whole $2.75 an hour when I had the privilege.
Next, after the girls squealed past us on their roller blades, we hit a stand of pine trees, and I mentally revisited Colorado. The sharp pine bouquet eclipsed the bean-field earthiness and bloomed into a mountain setting. I thought of many early mornings I've spent in Colorado. Stepping out the cabin door and sucking in the beauty of the awakening mountain sense-fest as the sun creeps over the range.
Then the squealing of the girls and the rumble of their skates across the bridge snapped me back to reality. And reality is a pretty nice place to be, too.
Sunday, June 03, 2007
Friday, June 01, 2007
Serials and Scenarios - Nicole's Weavings
Nicole had a little fun with this Q & A. So did I.
She went crazy in the creative corner. I dare you to read her off-the-cuff short stories and not want to read her novels...
Thanks, Nicole.
Can't wait to read what you're cooking up next.
Fiction character you would most like to be or most identify with and why?
Hmmm. That would be Dorothy in The Wizard of Oz or Alice in Alice in Wonderland because their imaginative worlds come to life for them. I feel a bit like that, being a writer.
Some out there in writing land have strange rituals. Share yours.
I write whenever the inspiration strikes, which may be at interesting times—in the
shower (I get some really creative ideas in there), while driving, etc. My ideas usually start out as scribbles on scraps of paper and receipts. I’ve also learned to write with The Wiggles and Teletubbies playing in the next room.
What crayon in the box describes you on a good day? Bad day? Which one do you aspire to be?
On a good day? Smooth Sailing Blue. On a bad day? Orange Frazzle. I aspire to be Peace of the Lord White.
Pick one…..Pink iguana, purple cow, periwinkle giraffe. Which one and why? Can be negative or positive.
I have one sitting in my cow collection right now, so I have to go with Purple Cow. My mother decided I needed to collect things in college, and she started sending me droves of cows. Voila, I have a collection.
Favorite turn of phrase or word picture, in literature or movie.
As a Southerner, I think it says it all when in Gone with the Wind, Rhett Butler says, “Frankly my dear, I don’t give a diddly.” Oh, wait. That’s the Christian fiction version : )
What makes you feel alive?
Watching my children share their chicken nuggets (it doesn’t happen very often), painting when it turns out well, writing when the words flow out effortlessly, singing a really cool song at church (we have a great band) and connecting with God. Oh, and finding new gray hairs. Wait, no. That just makes me feel old.
How does something worm its way into your heart? Through tears, truth, humor or other?
I’m a sucker for sentimental commercials. I may be tough as nails in daily life, but show me a cute little boy with a hoppy toad on TV, and I’m all tears.
Book, music, person, food you would take with you on a very long trip.
I’d have to take my kids because I’d miss them too much, so let’s make that a very short trip, okay? And my husband should come along because he’s lots of fun.
Where would you most like to travel ----- moon, north pole, deep seas, deserted island, the holy land or back to a place from your childhood, somewhere else? – and why.
I’ve always dreamed to going to Greece to view the ancient ruins. I’d also love to see the Egyptian pyramids for myself. But if possible, I’d like to travel back in time to see my parents together when I was a child. That way, I’d have all my facts straight and have the truth instead of my childhood being some far-off fairytale that I put too much time and energy into mourning. Oh, wait. Let’s just save that tidbit for my next book, shall we?
Favorite season and why?
Spring. You know, flowers blooming, birds singing. getting into shorts again. Oh, wait, let’s make that winter.
Favorite book setting and why?
Not sure why but every now and then, I find myself in the common area in Harry Potter’s dorm room in front of that fire. Anyone else do that too? Anyone? Anyone?
Which compliment related to your writing has meant the most and why?
My next book, Trouble the Water (coming in Feb 2008), is inspired very loosely by my deceased aunt Bonnie. My mother read the book and said, “Well, you captured her. The way she thought, everything.” That was my biggest complement because I realized the power of words then. I was able to bring my mother’s best friend back for just a short while.
What criticism has cut the deepest and why?
I think sometimes readers forget that as novelists, we are writing fiction. The comment that stings the most is from a reader who just doesn’t “get” my writing, yet takes it a step further and assumes that any and all opinions of my characters must be my own. I’ve been surprised at how judgmental a few people can be and how quickly some can question the faith or intention of a writer. This ain’t non-fiction folks. Just wait for the memoir : )
What would you do today if you knew you had only a week to live?
I’d gather all my loved ones and spend every second with them. Not even sleeping. And I’d try to memorize every single thing about them and tell each person exactly what they mean to me and how much I love them. I’d also read my Bible and pray to God, mostly that my family would be alright without me.
What is your favorite word?
Serendipity.
What word annoys you more than any other?
Uggh, I hate to even write it –“butt”. Can I say that here? Can’t stand the word. It seems so crude and crass. I much prefer “tushie” or “rear” or “behind”.
Favorite chore
Is this a trick question?
Anything you'd do but don't because of fear of pain? What is it? Ex. Bungee jumping, sky diving, running with scissors.
I’ve always thought skateboarding looks like tons of fun, but I really prefer my un-skinned knees. Funny how we get so attached to our bodies as we get older.
Grammatical pet peeve…sound off.
“Where’s it at?”
Excuse me? It’s not “at” anywhere.
Societal pet peeve…sound off.
Credit card companies preying on college students.
CREATIVE CORNER:
Describe something you can see, hear, taste or feel without telling us what the item is.
It crinkles in his two-year-old hands, and he giggles. He pops it in his mouth, and I tell him no. He puts it on his face and looks at me through it, but I tell him it’s dangerous. He takes both arms and waves it up and down, causing it to fill up with air. I really should have put that in the trash…
Two middle-aged females talking animatedly. One wears a very short skirt, and she ought not to be……………. Give me a scene, dialogue, characterization, drama……
“Well, I’ll be. Do you see that, Martha?”
The tennis court empties and a slender blonde wiggles into the clubhouse past two white rocking chairs.
“What, her? Hmmph. Ever since she dumped her husband and lost twenty pounds, she thinks she can flaunt that hiney any-which-where she pleases.”
Miss Meredith shifts uncomfortably in her seat, stealing a glance at her friend’s wrinkled knees. She obviously doesn’t get it. “Well now, she is young, and…firm…” Meredith coughs, “and perhaps, someone her age can get away with it.” She glances again at her friend and catches her eye.
“What, exactly, are you trying to say, Meredith Billingsby?” Martha’s eyes narrow, framed by sharp crow’s feet.
“I’m not implying any…oh, for heaven’s sake, Martha, you know and I know you’re too old for that dad-gum skirt you’re wearing! Can’t you see it?”
“I…what?!” Martha’s eyes glass over and her mouth crinkles up into a dried apple.
“Oh honey, don’t do that. Don’t do that,” says Meredith, touching her friend’s orange freckled arm. “Not that you don’t have the legs for it…’cause you do! You do. It’s just that, well, when a woman reaches a certain age…”
“Just how old do you think I am…” Martha says through pursed lips.
“Oh, I don’t know. About my age, right? Give or take a few years? I just turned sixty-seven.”
“Sixty-seven! Meredith! I’m only forty-two! Do I really look that old?!” She whines and clutches the arms of her rocker, nearly crushing them.
Oh heavens to Betsy, Martha thinks, hanging her head low and wondering why she ever opened her mouth. Didn't Mama tell me to keep it shut? "Uh, maybe you should just wear some more sunscreen? Here, sugar. I keep some in my bag." Meredith smiles demurely and hands it to her, then slathers some more on her own face, pulling her hat down over her ears…just in case.
If Alex had known the body of the senator was in the bathtub, she would've taken Jim's offer for coffee.
Jim, with his whining, wheezing, and that smell! Yet she’d kiss Jim full on the lips if she could avoid what she was seeing now.
Alex closed the shower curtain and sat down on the commode. All I wanted was some peace and quiet, she thought. The office had been a madhouse since the allegations of the senator’s affairs. And she’d done her best to spin it all—quite successfully, she thought. It was some of her best work.
“But why my bathtub?” she said to the corpse, lying there with a frozen silly grin. “Truly, George? Did you have to do this to me?”
She’d never had an affair with the senator. That’s the last thing she wanted. He was a bumbling old coot in her opinion, and she’d fended him off at every advance. Yet here he was, naked in tepid water, with his “little buddy” (as he so often referred to it) finally put to rest.
Alex pulled the shower curtain open again and a rubber ducky plopped down into the water. She stared at the ripples floating out over the senator’s chest and wished that ducky could just figure out how to spin….
She went crazy in the creative corner. I dare you to read her off-the-cuff short stories and not want to read her novels...
Thanks, Nicole.
Can't wait to read what you're cooking up next.
Fiction character you would most like to be or most identify with and why?
Hmmm. That would be Dorothy in The Wizard of Oz or Alice in Alice in Wonderland because their imaginative worlds come to life for them. I feel a bit like that, being a writer.
Some out there in writing land have strange rituals. Share yours.
I write whenever the inspiration strikes, which may be at interesting times—in the
shower (I get some really creative ideas in there), while driving, etc. My ideas usually start out as scribbles on scraps of paper and receipts. I’ve also learned to write with The Wiggles and Teletubbies playing in the next room.
What crayon in the box describes you on a good day? Bad day? Which one do you aspire to be?
On a good day? Smooth Sailing Blue. On a bad day? Orange Frazzle. I aspire to be Peace of the Lord White.
Pick one…..Pink iguana, purple cow, periwinkle giraffe. Which one and why? Can be negative or positive.
I have one sitting in my cow collection right now, so I have to go with Purple Cow. My mother decided I needed to collect things in college, and she started sending me droves of cows. Voila, I have a collection.
Favorite turn of phrase or word picture, in literature or movie.
As a Southerner, I think it says it all when in Gone with the Wind, Rhett Butler says, “Frankly my dear, I don’t give a diddly.” Oh, wait. That’s the Christian fiction version : )
What makes you feel alive?
Watching my children share their chicken nuggets (it doesn’t happen very often), painting when it turns out well, writing when the words flow out effortlessly, singing a really cool song at church (we have a great band) and connecting with God. Oh, and finding new gray hairs. Wait, no. That just makes me feel old.
How does something worm its way into your heart? Through tears, truth, humor or other?
I’m a sucker for sentimental commercials. I may be tough as nails in daily life, but show me a cute little boy with a hoppy toad on TV, and I’m all tears.
Book, music, person, food you would take with you on a very long trip.
I’d have to take my kids because I’d miss them too much, so let’s make that a very short trip, okay? And my husband should come along because he’s lots of fun.
Where would you most like to travel ----- moon, north pole, deep seas, deserted island, the holy land or back to a place from your childhood, somewhere else? – and why.
I’ve always dreamed to going to Greece to view the ancient ruins. I’d also love to see the Egyptian pyramids for myself. But if possible, I’d like to travel back in time to see my parents together when I was a child. That way, I’d have all my facts straight and have the truth instead of my childhood being some far-off fairytale that I put too much time and energy into mourning. Oh, wait. Let’s just save that tidbit for my next book, shall we?
Favorite season and why?
Spring. You know, flowers blooming, birds singing. getting into shorts again. Oh, wait, let’s make that winter.
Favorite book setting and why?
Not sure why but every now and then, I find myself in the common area in Harry Potter’s dorm room in front of that fire. Anyone else do that too? Anyone? Anyone?
Which compliment related to your writing has meant the most and why?
My next book, Trouble the Water (coming in Feb 2008), is inspired very loosely by my deceased aunt Bonnie. My mother read the book and said, “Well, you captured her. The way she thought, everything.” That was my biggest complement because I realized the power of words then. I was able to bring my mother’s best friend back for just a short while.
What criticism has cut the deepest and why?
I think sometimes readers forget that as novelists, we are writing fiction. The comment that stings the most is from a reader who just doesn’t “get” my writing, yet takes it a step further and assumes that any and all opinions of my characters must be my own. I’ve been surprised at how judgmental a few people can be and how quickly some can question the faith or intention of a writer. This ain’t non-fiction folks. Just wait for the memoir : )
What would you do today if you knew you had only a week to live?
I’d gather all my loved ones and spend every second with them. Not even sleeping. And I’d try to memorize every single thing about them and tell each person exactly what they mean to me and how much I love them. I’d also read my Bible and pray to God, mostly that my family would be alright without me.
What is your favorite word?
Serendipity.
What word annoys you more than any other?
Uggh, I hate to even write it –“butt”. Can I say that here? Can’t stand the word. It seems so crude and crass. I much prefer “tushie” or “rear” or “behind”.
Favorite chore
Is this a trick question?
Anything you'd do but don't because of fear of pain? What is it? Ex. Bungee jumping, sky diving, running with scissors.
I’ve always thought skateboarding looks like tons of fun, but I really prefer my un-skinned knees. Funny how we get so attached to our bodies as we get older.
Grammatical pet peeve…sound off.
“Where’s it at?”
Excuse me? It’s not “at” anywhere.
Societal pet peeve…sound off.
Credit card companies preying on college students.
CREATIVE CORNER:
Describe something you can see, hear, taste or feel without telling us what the item is.
It crinkles in his two-year-old hands, and he giggles. He pops it in his mouth, and I tell him no. He puts it on his face and looks at me through it, but I tell him it’s dangerous. He takes both arms and waves it up and down, causing it to fill up with air. I really should have put that in the trash…
Two middle-aged females talking animatedly. One wears a very short skirt, and she ought not to be……………. Give me a scene, dialogue, characterization, drama……
“Well, I’ll be. Do you see that, Martha?”
The tennis court empties and a slender blonde wiggles into the clubhouse past two white rocking chairs.
“What, her? Hmmph. Ever since she dumped her husband and lost twenty pounds, she thinks she can flaunt that hiney any-which-where she pleases.”
Miss Meredith shifts uncomfortably in her seat, stealing a glance at her friend’s wrinkled knees. She obviously doesn’t get it. “Well now, she is young, and…firm…” Meredith coughs, “and perhaps, someone her age can get away with it.” She glances again at her friend and catches her eye.
“What, exactly, are you trying to say, Meredith Billingsby?” Martha’s eyes narrow, framed by sharp crow’s feet.
“I’m not implying any…oh, for heaven’s sake, Martha, you know and I know you’re too old for that dad-gum skirt you’re wearing! Can’t you see it?”
“I…what?!” Martha’s eyes glass over and her mouth crinkles up into a dried apple.
“Oh honey, don’t do that. Don’t do that,” says Meredith, touching her friend’s orange freckled arm. “Not that you don’t have the legs for it…’cause you do! You do. It’s just that, well, when a woman reaches a certain age…”
“Just how old do you think I am…” Martha says through pursed lips.
“Oh, I don’t know. About my age, right? Give or take a few years? I just turned sixty-seven.”
“Sixty-seven! Meredith! I’m only forty-two! Do I really look that old?!” She whines and clutches the arms of her rocker, nearly crushing them.
Oh heavens to Betsy, Martha thinks, hanging her head low and wondering why she ever opened her mouth. Didn't Mama tell me to keep it shut? "Uh, maybe you should just wear some more sunscreen? Here, sugar. I keep some in my bag." Meredith smiles demurely and hands it to her, then slathers some more on her own face, pulling her hat down over her ears…just in case.
If Alex had known the body of the senator was in the bathtub, she would've taken Jim's offer for coffee.
Jim, with his whining, wheezing, and that smell! Yet she’d kiss Jim full on the lips if she could avoid what she was seeing now.
Alex closed the shower curtain and sat down on the commode. All I wanted was some peace and quiet, she thought. The office had been a madhouse since the allegations of the senator’s affairs. And she’d done her best to spin it all—quite successfully, she thought. It was some of her best work.
“But why my bathtub?” she said to the corpse, lying there with a frozen silly grin. “Truly, George? Did you have to do this to me?”
She’d never had an affair with the senator. That’s the last thing she wanted. He was a bumbling old coot in her opinion, and she’d fended him off at every advance. Yet here he was, naked in tepid water, with his “little buddy” (as he so often referred to it) finally put to rest.
Alex pulled the shower curtain open again and a rubber ducky plopped down into the water. She stared at the ripples floating out over the senator’s chest and wished that ducky could just figure out how to spin….
Thanks again, Nicole. And happy weekend one and all...
Thursday, May 31, 2007
Scribbles and Scrambles - Sleeping Single in a Double Bunk
In all the years we've been married, in all the sleep situations in which we've found ourselves - I have yet to have had the pleasure of sharing a bunk bed with my hubby.
This has changed.
We traveled to Minnesota over the weekend and the "grown-up" beds were all spoken for. I've slept in the bunk beds before...about 28 years ago while we were dating and I visited Minnesota with Rob's family. This trip, I had company. Rob grabbed the top bunk which turned out to be fortunate with my ability to injure myself.
Since we've been married we've shared a tent in the pouring rain ( a few times). A tent jam-packed full of children in all types of weather. Rocks have bruised my kidneys and small furry mammals interrupted my sleep. Our lullaby -- the buzzing of blood-thirsty mosquitoes alerting the others to fresh meat. Drifting off to the warm and fuzzy knowledge of a two a.m. walk to the outhouse should I attempt to slake my thirst.
We've slept in a family bed. Short-lived. Once I slept between him and a frightened child who had already surpassed me in height. This was a one-time arrangement. I awoke in a panic, suffocating, pinned and overheated, I bolted. Now the children are invited to sleep on the floor when a thunderstorm strikes. (Yeah, go ahead, notify PETA).
My hubby's former boss took us on a cruise once (in lieu of paying overtime -- probably highly frowned upon by wage and labor laws -- but, oh well). We were rocked to sleep in two single beds, but each pillow contained a mint every night.
Would I recommend a bunk bed? Well, the mattresses were new. That was a good thing -- especially upon hearing about the condition of the previous ones that rested on the rusted springs for 30+ years. Shudder.
I felt tall. If I stretched out I could touch both walls, as a matter of fact anyone over the height of 5'7" probably couldn't sleep without being overcome by claustrophobic nightmares full of rabid monkeys and bad poetry.
Speaking of rabid monkeys, I echo Dorothy "there is no place like home." As long as the children sleep on the floor, that is. And, in a pinch, borrowed beds without mosquitoes come in a close second.
This has changed.
We traveled to Minnesota over the weekend and the "grown-up" beds were all spoken for. I've slept in the bunk beds before...about 28 years ago while we were dating and I visited Minnesota with Rob's family. This trip, I had company. Rob grabbed the top bunk which turned out to be fortunate with my ability to injure myself.
Since we've been married we've shared a tent in the pouring rain ( a few times). A tent jam-packed full of children in all types of weather. Rocks have bruised my kidneys and small furry mammals interrupted my sleep. Our lullaby -- the buzzing of blood-thirsty mosquitoes alerting the others to fresh meat. Drifting off to the warm and fuzzy knowledge of a two a.m. walk to the outhouse should I attempt to slake my thirst.
We've slept in a family bed. Short-lived. Once I slept between him and a frightened child who had already surpassed me in height. This was a one-time arrangement. I awoke in a panic, suffocating, pinned and overheated, I bolted. Now the children are invited to sleep on the floor when a thunderstorm strikes. (Yeah, go ahead, notify PETA).
My hubby's former boss took us on a cruise once (in lieu of paying overtime -- probably highly frowned upon by wage and labor laws -- but, oh well). We were rocked to sleep in two single beds, but each pillow contained a mint every night.
Would I recommend a bunk bed? Well, the mattresses were new. That was a good thing -- especially upon hearing about the condition of the previous ones that rested on the rusted springs for 30+ years. Shudder.
I felt tall. If I stretched out I could touch both walls, as a matter of fact anyone over the height of 5'7" probably couldn't sleep without being overcome by claustrophobic nightmares full of rabid monkeys and bad poetry.
Speaking of rabid monkeys, I echo Dorothy "there is no place like home." As long as the children sleep on the floor, that is. And, in a pinch, borrowed beds without mosquitoes come in a close second.
Wednesday, May 30, 2007
Serials and Scenarios - The Spirit of Sweetgrass
Click on the book to visit the Amazon page.
Get to know Nicole @ her website
and then come back on Friday for Nicole's Q & A...
My Review:
"The Spirit of Sweetgrass" is a beautiful tribute to southern traditions and lifestyle as well as a disappearing art. The history and Gullah details in "Sweetgrass" makes it a must read for anyone fascinated with the culture of the Lowcountry.
Nicole Seitz writes beautifully, weaving and crafting, not unlike the baskets so diligently and painstakingly woven by her protagonist's loving fingers.
Those who expect a specific genre basket hook on which to hang "Sweetgrass" will find a touch of sweet romance with women's fiction depth, chock full of history and fantasy. "Sweetgrass" stretches beyond one genre and seeps into other categories. If forced to choose, I'd call it literary because of Nicole's style. I got caught up is Essie Mae's life from the beginning, and though there were a couple of chapters that dragged a bit for me, the end satisfied.
Jesus is mentioned throughout, but those who only read clear "how to be saved" Christian fiction aren't likely to feel comfortable reading "Sweetgrass." Nicole has managed to bust open the God box, maybe replacing it with a woven basket so He bursts out all over. Heaven sequences are thoughtful, speculative and may frustrate theologians. Serious jot and tittle Christian fiction readers may want to avoid reading "Sweetgrass," especially if they tend to read with a microscope. Voodoo and "ghosts" are tossed into the mix now and again, too.
If you love to ask God questions and like to ponder heaven, or if you curl up with lazy, literary fiction, quirky characters, cultural details and stories that wrap around your thoughts and your heart, I think you'll enjoy "Sweetgrass."
Friday, May 25, 2007
Serials and Scenarios - Rene Snitches
Rene's back with some answers to random questions.
Visit Wednesday's post to read more about her latest release, "Snitch."
If you could write in another language, which language would you choose? Why?
Hebrew. I think it would be amazing to be able to write in the original language of the Bible.
Flora and fauna or meat and potatoes? Why?
Meat and potatoes. I have no idea what flora and fauna are!
Favorite Blog or Website?
MSNBC. I'm always checking the headlines.
If you could only own three books, which ones would you own?
My Bible, my first novel, some really big, fat, deep, hard-to-understand theological book that I would normally never dream of reading.
Give a premise/tagline, character name, first line from a romance set in a sewage processing plant.
Hey...this sounds a little like Scoop! The book does revolve around a sewage processing plant. But not inside, so let me see here: FIRST LINE He knew immediately it was love, not because of how his heart skipped a beat or his skin perspired when she walked by. He knew because he could smell her floral perfume from the other room, and that was no small miracle in his world.
Share a moment when you realized that you really are a writer.
I was teaching at a writers conference and my name tag read: Rene Gutteridge, novelist.
Which book of the Bible fascinates or touches you most?
The book of John. I love the style of writing, I love the relationship they had. I can't read the first chapter without getting chills. I named my first child John.
If money/responsibilities were no object what would you do with one day?
Take my husband and kids to see the castles overseas.
Have a great weekend, everyone -- a nice long, relaxing, hang-out kind of three-day weekend.
Visit Wednesday's post to read more about her latest release, "Snitch."
If you could write in another language, which language would you choose? Why?
Hebrew. I think it would be amazing to be able to write in the original language of the Bible.
Flora and fauna or meat and potatoes? Why?
Meat and potatoes. I have no idea what flora and fauna are!
Favorite Blog or Website?
MSNBC. I'm always checking the headlines.
If you could only own three books, which ones would you own?
My Bible, my first novel, some really big, fat, deep, hard-to-understand theological book that I would normally never dream of reading.
Give a premise/tagline, character name, first line from a romance set in a sewage processing plant.
Hey...this sounds a little like Scoop! The book does revolve around a sewage processing plant. But not inside, so let me see here: FIRST LINE He knew immediately it was love, not because of how his heart skipped a beat or his skin perspired when she walked by. He knew because he could smell her floral perfume from the other room, and that was no small miracle in his world.
Share a moment when you realized that you really are a writer.
I was teaching at a writers conference and my name tag read: Rene Gutteridge, novelist.
Which book of the Bible fascinates or touches you most?
The book of John. I love the style of writing, I love the relationship they had. I can't read the first chapter without getting chills. I named my first child John.
If money/responsibilities were no object what would you do with one day?
Take my husband and kids to see the castles overseas.
Have a great weekend, everyone -- a nice long, relaxing, hang-out kind of three-day weekend.
Wednesday, May 23, 2007
Serials and Scenarios - Snitch
Click on the book to be whisked over to Amazon where you can find out a whole lot of information about Rene Gutteridge's newest release.
You can visit Rene by clicking, too.
And, of course, you can come on over on Friday to get a peek into her mind. Since she's already spilled her guts on the Scoop (book one of Occupational Hazards) tour, I had to come up with some more odd questions for her to answer.
My Review:
As much as I hate to admit this...I just figured out the whole Occupational Hazards series premise. Old school meets new school meets homeschool.
As in book one, Scoop, there is an older character who discovers that he may be an old dog that can learn a trick or two from a young pup. The young pup discovers the old dog survived to an age where he can taste retirement because he was smart enough to learn the game and wise enough to play by the rules.
Then we have the Hazards.
Mack Hazard stirs up under-cover work like Hayden upended the television newsroom in Scoop.
The homeschool uber-focused intelligence with the classic innocence born from limited socialization to the Christian faith that is refreshingly and foreignly foundational, shapes the Hazards into anomalies - attractive ones - but challenging and uncomfortable.
Gutteridge's humor is on display in her subtle descriptions and characterizations. Kyle -- the pastor on sabbatical with the Miami Vice dreams. Jesse -- the classic rebel cop -- with a few twists and snippets of his past come back to haunt him.
Nan and Ron, Laura and Dozer -- all characters that are real enough that you grow to care.
The story line is fast moving and well-developed.
I liked Scoop and Snitch is even better. Snitch can be read without Scoop, they stand alone, but the series will no doubt scatter bits of characterization for each sibling throughout.
If like Gutteridge, you're going to like this series. If you haven't tried her yet, give her a shot (pun intended, of course.)
As in book one, Scoop, there is an older character who discovers that he may be an old dog that can learn a trick or two from a young pup. The young pup discovers the old dog survived to an age where he can taste retirement because he was smart enough to learn the game and wise enough to play by the rules.
Then we have the Hazards.
Mack Hazard stirs up under-cover work like Hayden upended the television newsroom in Scoop.
The homeschool uber-focused intelligence with the classic innocence born from limited socialization to the Christian faith that is refreshingly and foreignly foundational, shapes the Hazards into anomalies - attractive ones - but challenging and uncomfortable.
Gutteridge's humor is on display in her subtle descriptions and characterizations. Kyle -- the pastor on sabbatical with the Miami Vice dreams. Jesse -- the classic rebel cop -- with a few twists and snippets of his past come back to haunt him.
Nan and Ron, Laura and Dozer -- all characters that are real enough that you grow to care.
The story line is fast moving and well-developed.
I liked Scoop and Snitch is even better. Snitch can be read without Scoop, they stand alone, but the series will no doubt scatter bits of characterization for each sibling throughout.
If like Gutteridge, you're going to like this series. If you haven't tried her yet, give her a shot (pun intended, of course.)
Monday, May 21, 2007
Serials and Scenarios...Tim Bete
I'm stepping out of the normal sequence of things. Call me Abby - Abby Normal, if you will.
I "met" Tim Bete on a Christian humor writers e-mail loop. He just published Guide to Pirate Parenting. How can I not include him in my Q & A's? The title alone...
I'll have my usual tour Wed and Friday of this week, but I just had to slip this in. Do go to Tim's Pirate Parenting website.
Questions in red, Tim is blue.
Fiction character you would most like to be or most identify with and why?
Cap’n Billy the Butcher MacDougall, from my book, Guide to Pirate Parenting. My relationship to Cap’n Billy is like Dr. Jekyll’s relationship to Mr. Hyde.
Some out there in writing land have strange rituals. Share yours.
I have a day job, so I usually write at night, after my kids are in bed. I grab a beer, sit down at the PC, and bang my head against the keyboard until I’m unconscious. When I come to, I clean the drool off the keyboard and look to see what I’ve written. It’s usually not pretty.
If you could change something in any novel, what would you change about it and why?
I’d rewrite classic literature, changing all the characters to pirates.
War and Pieces (of Eight) by Leo Tolstoy
Pride and Prejudice and Scurvy by Jane Austen
You get the idea. Any novel can be improved by adding pirates.
War and Pieces (of Eight) by Leo Tolstoy
Pride and Prejudice and Scurvy by Jane Austen
You get the idea. Any novel can be improved by adding pirates.
Favorite turn of phrase or word picture, in literature or movie.
From The Importance of Being Ernest:
Algernon. [Picking up empty plate in horror.] Good heavens! Lane! Why are there no cucumber sandwiches? I ordered them specially.
Lane. [Gravely.] There were no cucumbers in the market this morning, sir. I went down twice.
Algernon. No cucumbers!
Lane. No, sir. Not even for ready money.
Cucumbers are hysterical. The funniest vegetable by far.
Algernon. [Picking up empty plate in horror.] Good heavens! Lane! Why are there no cucumber sandwiches? I ordered them specially.
Lane. [Gravely.] There were no cucumbers in the market this morning, sir. I went down twice.
Algernon. No cucumbers!
Lane. No, sir. Not even for ready money.
Cucumbers are hysterical. The funniest vegetable by far.
What would you write if there were no rules or barriers?
I didn’t know that there WERE any rules or barriers? I must have missed that meeting. The best thing about writing is you can do whatever you want. It may not get published, but you can still do whatever you want.
What makes you feel alive?
Food, water, oxygen and an occasional glass of wine.
Favorite book setting and why?
I usually set books on the nightstand, next to my bed. Why? Because I read in bed. I also like books with ocean scenes. I love the water.
Which compliment related to your writing has meant the most and why?
One of the best compliments was this quote:
"I loved Guide to Pirate Parenting! It’s as if Cap’n Billy was ripped from me own loins, which would explain that drafty feelin’ I get in me nethers."
-- Mark "Cap'n Slappy" Summers, co-author of Pirattitude! So You Wanna Be A Pirate? Here's How, and co-founder of Talk Like a Pirate Day
Cap’n Slappy is the king of pirate humor, so I really appreciated his endorsement. Plus, I only had to send him a case of rum to get it.
"I loved Guide to Pirate Parenting! It’s as if Cap’n Billy was ripped from me own loins, which would explain that drafty feelin’ I get in me nethers."
-- Mark "Cap'n Slappy" Summers, co-author of Pirattitude! So You Wanna Be A Pirate? Here's How, and co-founder of Talk Like a Pirate Day
Cap’n Slappy is the king of pirate humor, so I really appreciated his endorsement. Plus, I only had to send him a case of rum to get it.
What criticism has cut the deepest and why?
When I was in kindergarten, I was a model in the local department store’s back-to-school fashion show. I had trouble unbuttoning the raincoat I was modeling. It ended my career as a male model. I was never asked back, and I had to return the raincoat. If only I could have handled those buttons, I’d be famous today.
What would you do today if you knew you had only a week to live?
First, I’d stop answering these questions. Then, I’d go to the beach with my family.
What is your favorite word?
What is your favorite word?
Special
What word annoys you more than any other?
Overdue
Favorite chore
One that’s already done. I hate folding socks.
CREATIVE CORNER:
At a writers’ workshop, the instructor asked attendees to write a short story that included mystery, sex and royalty. One attendee wrote: “I’m pregnant,” said the Queen. “I wonder who-dunnit?”
Now that’s a short story.
Now that’s a short story.
Describe something you can see, hear, taste or feel without telling us what the item is.
Okay, so there’s a really sharp pain in my left shoulder, and I can hear laughing and there’s a musty – slightly fishy – smell in the air, and then someone says, “That’s the last time you steal me rum, you scurvy bilge rat!”
Answer: The item was Cap’n Billy the Butcher’s hook. I bet the Emergency Room doctors haven’t had to remove a pirate from a writer before.
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